startthemachine:

The Big Texas Cinnamon Roll is like a wooden roller coaster at one of those weekend carnivals they set up in shopping mall parking lots - huge, awe-inspiring, and obviously fatal. I saw this in a vending machine and started looking around for Allen Funt. I had the same reaction as the first person to dig up a Tyrannosaurus skeleton and assumed Satan had raped it into existence with his hate penis. This thing packs a punch of 460 calories, which is only 90 less than a Big Mac. FOR BREAKFAST.

These are stocked at the vending machines at my school.

I remember freshman year, all the fat kids hung out there. I always wondered why, then I saw these things.

Explains so much.

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reblogged from startthemachine
originally posted by startthemachine

  1. cele-miller reblogged this from startthemachine
  2. nerdymcgee reblogged this from startthemachine and added:
    These are stocked...machines at my school....remember...
  3. startthemachine posted this

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